Motherfucking cocksucker motherfucking shit fucker what am I doing? What am I doing? I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m doing the best that I can. I know that’s all I can ask of myself. Is that good enough? Is my work doing any good? Is anybody paying attention? Is it hopeless to try and change things? The African guy is a sign, right? Because if he isn’t, than nothing in this world makes any sense to me. I’m fucked! Maybe I should quit. Don’t quit! Maybe I should just fucking quit. Don’t fucking quit! I don’t know what the fuck I’m supposed to fucking do anymore! Fucker! Fuck shit! -Albert Markovski

- I <3 Huckabees

Been thinking about hiking a lot lately&#8230;

Been thinking about hiking a lot lately…

Dowling side of the family with my Grandma. I love these old photos.

Now this blog will change & that’s life.

I’m no longer hiking the PCT. That is both a blessing and a curse. I’ve started a new chapter in my life and I think I’d like to use this page for ramblings associated with it. I’ve frequently been thinking about time lately and more specifically time management. I seem to have huge chunks of my day that aren’t really filled with any concrete activity. My interests are varied and when I stop and think about what I want to do in either the present or near future I am sometimes overwhelmed. I think, “how can I accomplish all of these things?” Well I usually don’t and the less important activities are (mostly) dropped by the wayside. But I know there are people out there who accomplish so much! I wonder if I’m lazy or are those types of people inherently different than I am? Is it actually within my ability to accomplish so much? We are all given the same number of hours in a day. The other way I tend to think that calms me is that I should not do so much and that less is more. There are benefits to reflection and stillness and simplicity. They can provide clarity in your life. I certainly learned this while hiking for four months. But now I’ve just added another thing (this blog) in my life that will possibly take away from some other thing. Oh well. I need to fix the flat tire on my bicycle so I can go to school without burning so many fossil fuels and get some exercise and be in the environment instead of protected from it. 

Gut Churn

"Kierkegaard talked about it this way: a man stands on the edge of a cliff and looks down at all the possibilities of his life. He reflects on all the things he could become. He knows he has to jump (i.e. make a choice). But he also knows that if he jumps, he’ll have to live within the boundaries of that one choice. So the man feels exhilaration but also an intense dread, what Kgard called ‘the dizziness of freedom.’”

Excerpt from Jad Abumrad

Things that don’t exist in the wilderness

Back to school shopping
Election bs/corrupt politicians aka politicians
Trying to impress people
…you get the idea


I love Radiolab & you should too. It’s a science based radio show & podcast that shan’t be missed. I listen to it on the trail quite a bit, along with This American Life & 99% Invisible (please give these a listen, you’ll love them & be enraptured, promise). Anyways, go to Radiolab’s website or their podcast on iTunes & listen to a relevant show (relevant to thru hiking) called Limits. Go listen, be inspired & learn something too!

Made it into Snoqualmie Pass, WA yesterday. Picked up my passport & Canadian entry form so I’m ready for Manning Park! Only 268-ish miles left.

Near Knife&#8217;s Edge in Goat Rocks.

Near Knife’s Edge in Goat Rocks.

Wildflowers in Goat Rocks.

Wildflowers in Goat Rocks.